Happy 2019!!! Welcome to a new year of memories and experiences. I'm not gonna say, "New year, new me!" because it's the same me. Instead, it's a new year with new motivations (as you saw from the title of this post). So what does that intell? Well for me, it's new goals I wanna achieve throughout the year. But not just set goals, these goals are things I want to continue and keep growing with throughout 2019 and the rest of my life.
First, I wanna focus on self-love more. If you follow me on instagram or are a friend of mine on Facebook, I posted a selfie yesterday (1/8) with the caption, "Here's to more self-love in 2019 #newyearnewmotivations #loveyourself". The older I get, the more I begin to accept myself for who I am and not what the world wants me to be. I'm definitely already a bit cocky and confident, but I want to continue with that. I'm not a super model with perfect teeth or perfect hair or a six pack, and I'm okay with that. Now that doesn't mean I can't take days to pamper myself and have mental days. I want to strive to feel completely comfortable in my skin and not dissect every flaw I have. Just taking that photo of myself, I had to retake it a million time because I would see a tiny imperfection that I didn't like and I wanted it to be "instagram worthy" (which I know is a dumb way of thinking). So here's to loving myself more in 2019 and beyond!
Secondly, I wanna be more intentional with my friends and family. This one is hard for me. I get inside my own world and don't think about reaching out to my friends to hang out, even after thinking about how much I miss them and wanna hang out. I realize it's a two-way street. I shouldn't expect them to be the ones to reach out. We're all busy, but I wanna make it a habit to be the one to reach out and not expect so much from others. Even with a phone call or text now and then. My family has been on me about this one. I HATE talking on the phone, but this year, for my family's sake, I wanna push myself to call home more and check up on them and say hey. Being intentional also means being more intentional with who I hang out with. I'm a social person, but I've learned that I get close to people too fast who are only temporary or who only wanna be friends in the moment and then we don't talk unless it's in a group or it's superficial. So, I wanna be more intentional with my real and true friends, and let go of toxic and fake friendships. In the end, I think it's better for my mental health and for the status of my good and true friendships.
Third, I wanna continue growing closer to God. If you know me at all, you'll know that my realtionship with Christ is a super important part of my life. This year, I've gone backwards a bit because I haven't gotten to experience much of a community outside of my roommates, because I was always working and was "too tired" to go to church. Which in return made me slip into old habits that I hate about myself. This year, I wanna go to church more and reconnect with my church family and get more involved, other than going once a month to teach the children. That means setting alarms to wake myself up. Going to bed ASAP on Saturday nights. Not making excuses. And maybe even telling my job that I need Sundays off again or finding another BFG or other group of Believers to help me be more accountable and to seek others to talk about the Bible and what God's plan is for my life. Along with growing more with Christ, I wanna read my Bible more. I've been slacking on that this year as well. But it's all apart of my continuous motivation goals of this year and beyond, because you can never hit a point where you can't get closer to God and His word.
Next motivation is travelling more. I want to get out of my small town and state and see the world. I'm making enough money now that I can save up to even go to Tennessee or Chicago or somewhere that's not Kentucky for a few days. For 2019, I wanna add to my list of places I've visited. And I think it's plausible if I motivate myself to save up and make a list of things to go out and do. It will break up the monotony of just working and coming home and then randomly going places within Lexington and surrounding cities. One day, I'm hoping to go back to NY and Ireland and all of my favorite places. So, 2019 begins the year of saving up for those things.
Another motivation is that in 2019 I wanna be more bold. I wanna take risks. Accept compliments from strangers and people I know. Actually try dating for once (if the opportunity arises and I see that it's fit for me). Make hard decisions. Overall, I just wanna be bolder and be a person that I'll look back and be proud of years down the line.
Finally, this last motivation is one that I don't talk about much, but is something I'm passionate about. I wanna sing more. Singing has been a passion of mine every since I was old enough to learn a song by myself, which was probably "Jesus Loves Me". I used to be in choir in high school and even took a vocal class my sophmore year of college, but it's not something I've publicized outside of church back in the day. I've tried making a few videos on YouTube and Instagram, but ultimately I got too timid and hated how they turned out after I posted them. But this year I wanna work more on my voice and start posting more singing content. I love music and I love singing, and I think this year is the year when I'm finally able to start finding ways to enjoy performing again for more than just me and my roommates. Out of all of my goals, this one is honestly the scariest for me, and it might take me a bit to start, so hold me accountable PLEASE!
So here's to 2019! Here's to new motivations. Here's to making new life changes for the better. Here's to not making resolutions, but fufilling life goals. Here's to becoming a better version of myself. That's what I'm hoping to gain from this year and years to come. As one of my favorite bands, All Time Low say, "Maybe it's not my weekend, but it's gonna be my year." Happy new year! I hope you have a successful one!
Live for God & Love for Music!
-Pay <3 :)
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